Of Therapists and friendly gestures

Today we had our initial booking assessment for counselling for #1 Son.

It’s to assist with his IEP – the psychologist referred us and I would be stupid to refuse the help. In my view anything that helps him handle the world and his place in it is a bonus.

Information will be shared between the counsellor, the school and his Primary Care Physician. Again, this just seems smart and sensible – it limits the risks of triangulation and keeps everyone on the same page.

The counsellor seems lovely, and I hope will be dubbed another Feelings Lady. We start fortnightly sessions on Tuesday from 02 January.

This is a very positive step.

Yesterday I had my nails done again

I’ve switched to a more local salon which is half the cost of the one based in Cambridge.

I’m learning the value of shopping around though, as the wonderful H (from downstairs) and her daughter were still shocked at the $30 price tag attached to these festive lovelies.

So, she has suggested that I go with her in the New Year and we get them done together. And I’m really happy to do that.

Last week I popped down with a pretty hamper of goodies to say thank you and merry Christmas, as I firmly believe in kind gestures (and we all know I really want to make friends here)!

She was shocked speechless but in a good way

Last night she came up with a beautiful plate of hand baked cookies on a “Giving Plate” which we are to in some way inscribe our names on and pass on.

I’ve already scoffed about half the cookies (yes I let the kids help), asked for the recipes and offered knitting lessons in return.

I’m so grateful for the offer of friendship. She seems so nice, we seem to get on well and heck she lives downstairs.

Long may this continue.

4 months in

Well. I (we) have now been living in the USA for a third of a year 🙀

Have I learned anything?

Nothing earth shattering. People are people everywhere. Some suck. Others do not. I still struggle making friends but maybe that’s just how it is.

I’ve invited H up to ours for a coffee on Friday as we will (hopefully) have a sofa arrive tomorrow so I will have somewhere for her to sit comfortably while we natter. And she really seems nice, so perhaps I can manage that? She seemed really happy to accept and has been so friendly.

———-

I’ve drawn a line under the possibility of friendship from the knitting class. I’m looking on it as purely educational with a hint of social, and that’s okay. I’ve done it before.

As the weather is changing and getting colder, I’m going to stick it out until the sock(s) are finished then explore other options towards the spring. I’ve got a (probably irrational) fear of being stuck in an unfamiliar town in the snow with no way to get home.

————

I wrote the above before going to my group tonight. I actually had fun. I am officially still confused as to what the hell is going on though.

It was the start of a new 10-week session tonight and there were a lot of people. Including one lady who hadn’t been there in a while due to being hit by a car. She was bubbly and fun and, when she realised I am British, basically grabbed on to me and asked me to talk to her all night.

I didn’t, but people chuckled and found it charming. I am not trying to work it out anymore.

I got a lift home with the lovely G (the lady who gave me her cell number) and she asked if, when I have my hysterectomy, if I want company for an hour or two for knitting and a cuppa she would be happy to.

She had the op at 31 and for the same reasons, so she “gets” it.

Surely you don’t make that sort of offer if you don’t like the person right? Perhaps I have made a friend?

Oh, and I’ve worked out how to share the Fun Run link:

Turkey Trot weblink: Here

The aftermath

So. I am home.

Before leaving TT and I made matching hair:

Which cheered me up.

The lady who rang me was really pleased to see me. I got a hug and a back rub, and told they were very happy I came.

I was confused.

She then helped me with my sock for over an hour.

I’m having issues with turning the heel and the pattern is written assuming use of Double Pointed Needles instead of Magic Loop on a circular needle so she asked if I would be coming on Wednesday to get more help.

And I want to.

Yet five hours ago I was sobbing and heartbroken.

My brain confuses me.

They gave me an out, in the sense that they asked if they should keep the cheque and I said yes.

It’s just, it’s local, some of the ladies seem nice. And it’s a good space to decompress and doesn’t involve large amounts of travel.

I don’t know.

I know I want to finish this sock. I was even taught how to knit and purl faster tonight.

I’m going to snuggle with the hus-creature, eat tacos, drink booze and watch The Walking Dead and not think for a bit.

Who I am

I am loud. I am boisterous. I am chatty. I am loving. I am neurotic. I am obsessive. I am weird. I am strange. I am brave. I am not as tough as I would like to be. If I love you I will go to the ends of the earth for you. I give people too much benefit of the doubt.

I am also too much for some people to handle.

In the nicest possible way I am being asked not to return to my Wednesday knitting group. No, honestly it was done very nicely. I have apparently been a bit too talkative and people want to just sit and knit and decompress.

They haven’t cashed my cheque from last week and have suggested I pay ad hoc for a few more sessions to see how it goes. They gave me suggestions on how I could fit in. I do believe that if I could manage them and be what they wanted that it could work.

But honestly? I won’t be able to change myself, I’ve tried before and it never sticks. Then I’ll either sit up there and not say anything but somehow make people uncomfortable with that, or I’ll forget and start chatting again and upset people.

So I have chatted to the hus-creature and my other bestest friend in the world and they have made me see that it’s not my fault, it’s just a bad fit.

So I’m going up tonight to finish the Magic Loop class I paid for (I do want to learn the technique) and then I think I shall collect my cheque, make noises about “holiday commitments” if asked and then not go back.

I am a square peg, and this class is a round hole. Its just not the correct place for me, and I should leave it to the round pegs who are settled and happy.

The hus-creature has already found a group called The Drunken Knitwits who meet in bars and knit and they meet on Monday’s. So I shall try that tomorrow (needs a Lyft) and report back.

I mean knitting and alcohol? What’s not to like?

I debated not writing this. I debated baring myself in this way. But nobody will be everyone’s cup of tea and that’s okay.

I am fish fingers and custard.

As long as being you doesn’t break laws, keep on being you.

Happy Veterans’ Day

Or otherwise entitled happy enforced bring your children into work day.

At least as far as the hus-creature’s colleagues are concerned.

For you see, there is no school today. And actually there was no school on Tuesday either as it was an election day. Don’t ask me why, no idea, couldn’t vote anyway but the kids had a day off school.

We declared it a pyjama day today as it’s suddenly really cold, and the electrician is in the middle of digging a trench to run cables to allow us to plug in the car – and it has to be done quick before this cold snap turns more permanent.

And also because neither child wanted to get dressed and I couldn’t be bothered to have an argument when we didn’t need to – it’s not like we had to go anywhere.

Today’s attempt at feeding children part the first:

TT ate barely anything, but #1 Son ate everything apart from the banana (and he at least bit that).

This was dinner:

#1 Son has decided this is evil, but TT cleared her plate.

I give up.

So #1 Son has only had a three day week. Surprisingly he has handled it far better than I expected. I choose to infer nothing from this as it could mean absolutely anything. So yesterday we had to walk home from school as our lovely J had another appointment. So we went and got our usual ice creams.

The irony of buying ice cream when the temperature has dropped significantly is not lost on me but a mile and a half walk is tiring for him and it’s a nice little treat and it’s something that both children eat and enjoy.

Actually as we were walking to school we walked past our usual ice cream shop and the Tiny Tyrant pointed at it and said “Hello ice cream yay bye-bye” as I had told her we were getting ice cream after picking up #1 Son.

Her comprehension and vocabulary appear to be expanding by the day. I’m doomed!!!!

On Wednesday (yes I know I’m jumping around a bit) I had my (now becoming usual) “Sit ‘N Knit” class and as this one is from 7 to 9 PM I miss children bedtime so I make sure that I say goodnight to them before I leave. When I said goodbye to TT she said “no mummy no out not yet. Cuddle”

Which is a bloody good sentence, shows incredible comprehension and is manipulative as all get out.

Yep doomed.

So I sat and knitted my sock I have managed to start on the heel! Huzzah! Yes yes I am very well aware that a sock needs a friend but let’s just go one at a time shall we?

And the long-memoried in the audience may recall that last week I was obsessing over a certain skein of yarn…

Well the precious is mine:

Wonder. Woman. Socks.

I think it might have been the final skein from the current batch. I had to rummage to find it.

I will knit them. I will stroke them. I will love them. I will wear them.

I so rarely make things for me.

Oh and I got my first knitting friend cell number 😊😊😊

Yesterday I popped downstairs to give H another bag of outgrown TT clothes (thankfully she seems happy to have them – I always worry in case it’s seen negatively somehow) and we finally managed to exchange numbers.

I also met her twin grandsons – very sweet boys 😊

It also seems she’s as keen on Christmas as she is on Halloween – so I’ve happily handed over outside decorating to her.

I can handle a tree (and finally a real tree – the cat will be a bastard with whatever we get, and after all, she is a forest cat) and maybe some indoor decorations, but I’m not ready to tackle outside yet…

Finally settling perhaps?

I realised yesterday that we’ve been in “our house” for two months.

That means we’ve been here longer than the temporary accommodation in Cambridge.

I can’t say the hus-creature is enjoying this commute as much as the previous one, particularly with a busted foot, but life is becoming predictable and routine for us, which is a blessing.

We’ve had teething troubles, I admit:

  • Sofa isn’t here – we couldn’t get it into the property so that’s a more lengthy story for another day.
  • We haven’t unpacked fully yet – the last few boxes need a final bookshelf constructed, which needs an available landlord’s partner to safely affix it to wall.
  • Car charger not yet installed – that’s going to be expensive and require digging a trench.

But I’m determined to stay here long term.

  • We have a lovely landlady who is friendly and approachable but who is happy to let us be.
  • Brilliant downstairs neighbours who are open and warm and also understand having special needs kids.
  • I’m starting to make friends through knitting group and the school run.
  • Do I wish the school was closer? Yes, yes I do but I will sort out driving again and then I will do the run and it will be fine.

I’m getting my own medical stuff sorted, and I think it’s going to be okay, just might take some time.

I’m really looking forward to thanksgiving – said lovely landlady is going to pop in to feed (and probably fuss) the cat so I don’t have to worry about that.

Things are starting to fall into place a little.

All Hallows’ Eve

Stateside is just magical.

 

No really, it was amazing.

#1 Son had a party and parade at school. He has worn not one, not two, but three costumes today:

  • Pumpkin Ghost – he made this himself, consisting of his long sleeved jack o lantern t-shirt and red trousers (they had to be red)
  • Dinosaur costume – a National History Museum official one for the school party. They were not allowed masks, makeup, blood or weapons.
  • The Blue Power Ranger – for Trick or Treating with me and TT.

TT was Harley Quinn – because daddy couldn’t find “Demon Spawn From The Hell Pits” in a 2T.

The shoes didn’t make it home 😐🙃

So the city of Melrose ran a Halloween Trick or Treat event 15:30 – 17:00. So given it gets dark, and TT is still so little we did the full run. Local businesses along Main Street were handing out candy and doing activities with the kids.

So. Many. Costumes. I had dressed up as Cleopatra for the heck of it, and I wasn’t the only adult in costume. Not only that, but one of the staff from the local Mexican cantina was wearing the same costume!

So. Much. Candy.

No really, this is TT’s haul:

With a shout out to Aunty Diana for the bags, which had TT shouting “Kitty cat” a lot.

#1 Son (rather sensibly) disappeared his haul to his room as soon as he got home. He has slightly more than her, but she soon got very good at shouting “my turn” whenever she saw him get candy.

She charmed extra out of one business by saying “ta” when she was handed chocolate.

We had so much fun, honestly. It was a perfect afternoon, beautiful weather, fun activities – there were at least two haunted houses and both kids loved it.

We initially planned to go out as a family later, but #1 Son was overwhelmed after all the people and noise (and I wasn’t far behind him if I’m honest), it was very close to TT’s bedtime, and daddy had a new shoes blister; so we decided to put a pin in it for this year.

Sadly we have only had one set of house-to-house Trick or Treater’s but hey ho.

What we did at the weekend

We decided to put the new shiny (car) through his paces.

Took the kids out for lunch on Saturday where #1 Son actually ate food. TT demanded a burger then refused to eat it.

No change there then. 🙄🙄🙄

The wonderful hus-creature then dropped me off for my nail appointment.

Due to unforeseen casualties, which included breaking every nail, and actually ripping two of them (and yes that did hurt. A lot.) I had been forced to cancel and reschedule. It had therefore been three weeks since my last one.

So poor Lily had a bit of a mess to work with, but she managed these amazing Halloween nails:

She didn’t have all her brushes so the free style drawing is, to me, even more impressive! She’s actually on leave in a fortnight (how very dare she 😂🤣) so I’ve been forced to book for another 3 weeks time. Ah well, they’ll be gorgeous for thanksgiving at least.

Sunday was even better. We went to New Hampshire (first time I’ve crossed state lines) to spend the afternoon with friends at their small holding.

It. Was. Awesome.

First we stopped for lunch:

Then once we arrived I met all the animals I’ve heard so much about.

The goats:

Lib will be breeding the biggest goat soon for milk and bebbeh goats 💕💕💕

The steers:

They are being raised for meat. Faux and Lib asked us to stay for dinner (which was not expected and very generous of them) and we ate Ronald. Who was their previous beef steer. With apologies to those vegetarians and vegans who may read this, home reared meat is delicious.

I met the alpacas. Knit and Purl.

 This is Knit, she hates everyone and will eat your soul given half a chance.

She definitely has resting bitch face:

This is Purl, who is slightly lighter in colour, and will tolerate humans and the very occasional pet:

There were all the chickens and ducks:

I was also given a dozen fresh eggs to take home. I’m planning yumminess with those… store bought eggs here are just not the same.

Also the next dinner:

This cockerel is being evil to the other males so at some point omnomnom.

It may seem cruel to some but honestly? I’m genuinely impressed with the set up, and it teaches where food really comes from. Could I slaughter or pluck myself? Maybe not, but knowing the animal is genuinely free range? Priceless.

There are also various house animals including a dog (who was shut away as #1 Son was nervy), two house cats we didn’t meet, and a house rabbit that TT just adored. There were also baby chicks and barn cats that stayed aloof. It’s such a wonderful setup.

All the kids had a blast, and I got some adult time 👍🏻