On rights

Human rights.

We are all human beings. We all deserve to be considered equal.

In recent years a number of events have occurred that are working towards this as a goal.

  • Marriage Rights for same-sex couples
  • Reproductive Rights

Just for the record, in case there was any doubt, I am firmly, pro-choice and pro same-sex marriage. Oh and also pro same-sex couples being able to adopt (and foster, but I think that might be a little easier)

Overall I am significantly privileged in my day to day life. I’m:

  1. Straight
  2. Cis
  3. Female
  4. White

Oh yes, racism rears it’s head because our recent green card experience was SO DIFFERENT to that of a colleague of the hus-creature who just so happened to not be white.

Now I’m never going to say that being a woman is easy, it’s bloody not. I’ve had enough grief and heartache simply having my medical issues taken seriously.

Now just for a second could we imagine that I was not cis?


Cis, for people who may not be aware, is the term used to describe those of us as individuals who identify with our gender assigned to us at birth.


In my case to not be cis would mean that I identified as male in a female body.

I just cannot imagine dealing with endometriosis and also knowing I was in the wrong body.

But people do. There are people who are born assigned male who know they are female, and vice versa.

And for this to be corrected in whatever manner the individual wants (and it doesn’t always mean surgery ok?) they need support. They need to have the right to seek the treatment they need.

Did you know that one of the treatments for endometriosis is the same medication that is often prescribed for transitioning individuals? I didn’t. Until I was prescribed it. Because it shuts down your ovaries. Yes, I was on a puberty blocker. Amongst other things – it also treats both aggressive breast cancer and prostate cancer.

I know? Who knew right? Bloody wonder drug it is. And also costs thousands of dollars per shot out here. But that’s a separate rant for another blog post.

Did that change my sexual orientation? No.

Did that change my gender identity? No.

Oh and yes, I was also prescribed Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) because I still needed the hormones that my body wasn’t making at the time.


And yes, I’m still on them now


Did that change my sexual orientation? No.

Did that change my gender identity? No.

I was still female. Still a woman. And recognised as such. Which put me in an interesting position of privilege.

But why am I musing on this today? Because today, one of my (previously) favourite authors – JK Rowling – has confirmed that she is a TERF.

What is a TERF? That would be a Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminist.

She believes that you can only be a woman if you were born biologically one. Likewise you can only be a man if you are born biologically one. Whatever “biologically” actually means. DNA testing has shown that there’s much more complexity to things than simple XY and XX meaning Male and Female respectively.

No. Science has proven this to not be true. And regardless – if it doesn’t affect you why does it matter?

By this I mean – you don’t have to experience something to agree with it.

Likewise just because it would never be a thing you would do, doesn’t mean you have to vilify it.

I am comfortable in my skin, in the gender I was assigned at my birth. I did not choose this. It’s the way I am wired. The way my brain works. I am lucky.

There are individuals for whom that is not the case. And they are human. They deserve rights. They deserve the same rights as everyone else. They deserve to be able to receive the medical care they need (whether self funded or otherwise) to be well. To be safe. In whatever format that takes for them. They deserve not to be persecuted for their existence.

And for those thinking “but what about bathrooms” and similar things can I ask you something? Do you have gendered bathrooms in your house? Do your neighbours? No. Because that’s insane. Transgender individuals are no more likely to assault another person than any other group. Could it happen? Of course, but not simply because they are transgender.

That would be because they are a bad person. Which has nothing to do with gender identity or sexual preference.

I do understand that it’s difficult. That there’s a sensitivity to it but with the bathroom part that’s easy – gender neutral bathrooms with locking cubicles. That way no one sees what’s in your pants. Gyms etc? Gender-neutral lockable cubicles for changing in. That way no one sees what is in your pants. No one has a urinal in their bathroom do they? They aren’t a requirement. I mean, I have no idea if they are more comfortable than peeing standing up, what with not having the prerequisite equipment, but men poop too. And to quote South Park:

You don’t take a dookie in the urinal

My gym has three lockable areas to change. Two of them have a shower. It’s never been an issue – never been too full to not change.

Hell even the building TT’s dance class is held has gender neutral toilets on every floor. And yes, it makes me happy to see it. Because that’s the minimum needed to make so many people feel safe.

So I’ve made a slightly early New Year’s Resolution.

In 2020, I intend to go to Pride. I’m going to go, and I am going to offer “Mom Hugs” to any LGBTQ+ person who needs or wants them.

This world is getting scarier by the day and if I can help in any small way I will. People shouldn’t be living in fear because of who they are.

Because let’s face it, why the hell would anyone choose to live their lives in fear? If being gay was a choice, I don’t believe anyone would choose to put themselves in the harms way that it currently is. And it shouldn’t be.

Love is love. Gay, straight, bi, ace, black, white or other. Life is life.

As ever I’m sure I haven’t expressed myself the way I intended to, but I hope at least I’ve made sense.

I will end this post by saying, if this is something that you personally disagree with. That’s fine. You do you boo. But do not legislate against other human beings simply because they differ from you. As long as it doesn’t harm anyone, agree to disagree and move on.

And vaccinate your dang kids people. That does cause harm.

Oh and here’s some reading material:

Love Lives Here

Yes, You Are Trans Enough

Oh and while I’m on this train. The Earth isn’t flat.

Author: Fliss

Wife, mum (of two), yarn-obsessed cat-slave

One thought on “On rights”

  1. I know JK Rowling did not study biology at Uni, but I am surprised by her ignorance, as sex determination is not exactly new science: all the variations were clearly explained in my textbook of developmental psychology. Sadly, I threw away the book decades ago because I felt it must be completely out of date.

    Lots of drugs are used for different conditions, I think it depends on the dose. Ask your dad. Many years ago the vet prescribed Trental for Lola, to increase blood flow to the extremities. Can you think of another extremely well-known drug that does just that?? In Lola’s case, it is to reduce the abnormality of her claws.

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