Heathcare – Melrose Mom-ing

Women’s Rights

I’m just going to say this:

Abortion. Is. Healthcare

That’s it. It’s basic healthcare for uterus owning individuals. No-one should be forced to carry a pregnancy to term if they don’t want to.

That’s it. End of.

I might not have a uterus anymore but this does not change my opinion.

According to a certain subset of humans out here, my hysterectomy means I’m no longer a woman. And that I’m certainly not supposed to have an opinion on this issue any more.

I have a daughter. A daughter who stands a non-zero chance of inheriting my medical conditions. As such she may:

Struggle to conceive.
Be in extreme physical pain.
A seriously increased risk of an ectopic pregnancy. Which could kill her.

And if we were living in Texas right now, would. Because Texas has banned abortions and all relevant drugs. You cannot seek an abortion in Texas beyond six weeks of pregnancy.

No. Exceptions.

That’s right. None.

Been raped? Nope.
Sexually assaulted in another way that resulted in pregnancy? Nope.
Victim of incest? Nope.
You will die if you continue the pregnancy? Nope.
Your baby has a condition that is incompatible with life? Nope.
Contraception failure? Nope.

No abortion for you.

But that’s OK right? I mean, you can give the baby up for adoption yes? Oh wait you mean there’s no additional services there?

OK, but there will be an additional commensurate increase in social programmes to support these mothers and babies yes?

Because it’s not about the baby. It’s about controlling and punishing women.

The lawmakers who created the bill have a stated publicly that Women should simply practice abstinence if they don’t want to get pregnant.

That’s right ladies – we should just keep our legs crossed.

Which, you know, won’t backfire on us at all will it now? That won’t increase risk of rape – by strangers or by someone we know at all right?

I have an idea. If pregnancy is God’s will? So is erectile disfunction. So no abortion for people who need them? No Viagra for men who need it.

I’m done arguing about this.

There were marches today across the whole country. As I still have kiddos who are too young to get vaccinated, I couldn’t risk marching. But I’ve campaigned. I’ve supported. I’m keeping my information current.

The DOJ is actually suing Texas thankfully but this is the thin edge of the wedge. Other states agree. And the Supreme Court desperately wants to try and overturn Roe vs. Wade.

We cannot allow this to happen!

Because make no mistake. Banning abortion doesn’t stop abortion. It just prevents safe abortions.

Women. Will. Die.

And all those Republican men whose wives, mistresses and unwed teenagers (daughter’s or otherwise) will still be able to obtain them.

This is a disgusting piece of legislation designed to target and punish poor women and BIPOC women and other uterus possessors.

I’m angry and I firmly believe that we should all be.

Day Two?

Or is it three? My counting might be off. This is certainly Day 3 in hospital. And I might just be going home today.

I’m a little apprehensive about that – but only because I’ve been liking having a motorised bed.

So, yesterday was spent in a fug of dozing, sipping liquids, attempting food, and having meds.

I’ve (at the nurse’s suggestion) cut back my Oxycodone to one 5mg tablet every four hours, which coupled with Tylenol every six is keeping me tolerably comfortable. And it means my prescription of Oxy will last a bit longer, giving me more time to heal.

As previously stated, this is not pain free. But it’s working. And I get to keep my support band thing thank the gods.

By my reckoning I am coming up to the 36 hours past where the belly tap should have worn off so this is a good sign.

The nurses here are amazing. No, really they are. I’m on the Mother and Baby ward and so I’m a little bit of an oddity and I’m being looked after so well.

Yesterday there was a really sweet High School student doing work shadowing, and she was so happy and bubbly. She was telling me all about how much she loves kids and the M&B ward. And we bonded over how we both swallow tablets

Sip of water, tablet in mouth, snap head back to swallow

Which apparently everyone in her family consider weird – so I’ve told her to say it’s the British way 😂🤣

So I think I was a bit of interest in her day. Overall I haven’t heard many babies, I think twice we’ve had “I am a new person and I am angry” levels of noise, and some of what sounded like hyped up older children visiting, but I’m in my own side room so I don’t disturb them and vice versa.

Food still isn’t interesting me much. I had a good breakfast yesterday:

I ate it all. I plan on re-ordering it today and hoping there’s tinned peaches today rather than the banana.

Lunch I think I was too optimistic – I ate my corn, half my chicken breast and my chocolate ice cream. Ignored my baked potato.

So for dinner I just went with chicken noodle soup and the ice cream. I’m keeping well hydrated with ice water and apple juice and nibbling on graham crackers so I’m not worried.

And it’s not like I couldn’t afford to lose a few pounds 😂🤣

TMI ALERT

I still haven’t pooped though. But considering how little I’m eating overall I’m not too worried yet.

I went for a short walk yesterday which is great progress. Getting up and down still hurts like anything, but moving around is beginning to become easier.

Okay, time to order food, as I actually feel hungry 🙀

Is it Autism or is it ADHD?

And overall does it matter?

This is of course in reference to #1 Son.

The answer is not straightforward. I want to say no, of course it doesn’t.

But you see, it does.

It affects the services he has access to, the support provided, and of course, his future.

So it matters.

As his mom, I don’t care – he’s my amazing boy and I’m proud of him and I love him and I don’t want to change him.

But as a human? As a parent? I know he is struggling and he needs help.

I can’t see him struggle day by day. Which is why he now has fortnightly counselling sessions. Of which we had the first one this week.

And it was interesting.

His assigned counsellor is expert in both fields, and after only one full session, she is querying if he is autistic.

We’ve been wondering ourselves for a while, as he just isn’t ticking all the boxes and the ones he does it’s either inconsistently or not in the right way.

The initial things she has raised are:

Eye contact – yes he prefers not to, but he can be directed back and made to keep focus.
Conversations – he talks emotively and well.
Affection – he shows emotions appropriately.

She also pointed out that he’s young and a boy, and that ADHD in young children, especially boys, is often mis-diagnosed as Aspergers/high functioning autism.

Fortunately this therapist is medication averse, so even if it is ADHD, she won’t immediately throw him into Adderall.

Which is good. He’s too young. The hus-creature has stayed Switzerland through this whole thing, as he feels it’s not his remit. He also (like me) is reluctant to medicate a young child. However he has much more experience within his working field of adults with ADHD and within his own circle Adderall has been touted as a miracle. Some quotes given have included

It lifts the fog from my brain

And

If it’s a choice between eating this month and affording the co-pay for my pills, I am not eating this month.

Side note: hurrah American health care where that is a bloody choice you have to make.

So if it comes down to it, I am reassured that medication could help. But the optimum word there is could. I (we) will not be throwing pills at our boy any time soon.

But if you gave me the choice between the disorders? In my heart of hearts I would prefer it to be ADHD – because it would be easier for him to fit into a “normal” mould.

But it is whatever it is, and whatever that is, we will deal with it.

Because this kid? He’s bloody awesome.

Not to be outdone

By her brother, TT was completely hysterical and inconsolable from 1-2am

I brought her into our bed to calm down but we got poked, slapped, pinched, “hello hello mommy/daddy” and “shhhhhhhhhh”‘d at until we gave up and put her back in the cot at 2.

She settled seemingly easily (I should have been more suspicious) and we got up at the normal time and I went in to get her up.

Only to be greeted by a scene from The Exorcist 🤢

So it’s been a double bath day for both kids. But honestly you would not know she’s been sick.

This was filmed at 09:09:

Hop the bunny

I didn’t know she knew that bunnies hopped!

Whilst I am following the normal sickness bug protocols just in case, I am mostly putting it down to irritated gut from all the screaming.

She has not been happy with following the BRAT diet all day.

I also introduced her to Simon’s Cat in an attempt to save my sanity today.

There has since been a constant litany of “more cat”, “more kitty” or “more bunny”.

It’s been a long day.

I also had an appointment with my primary care doctor at 11:15. Ostensibly for a medication review.

I’m not certain he has prescribed me anything for my professed (and finally admitted) anxiety but he has definitely given me a prescription for blood pressure medication.

Yes, I have hypertension.

Deep joy.

I have been suffering from blinding headaches off and on for over a month and finally I admitted that the hus-creature was correct to nag me about it as it could not just be put down to “late Zoladex jab”

My lovely doctor man concurred with this, and I need to return at 09:45 on Monday December 11th to see if it’s improving.

I was still waiting for over an hour to see him though….

This is not the shining example that is being touted across the pond…

I mean it’s good, at least if you have insurance, don’t get me wrong, but it’s flaws are incredibly similar to those I have experienced within the NHS.

Also, the pharmacy did not have the required medicaments. They offered to send it to another pharmacy, but I needed to get home so that the hus-creature could get into work for the afternoon. Also, it was sent as an electronic prescription so I’m not certain I trust it to be sent along, and I’m not entirely sure where any other pharmacies are locally.

All good fun.

Health Update

So, I’ve had another Zoladex stabbing today.

Going to a specific gynaecology practice made the experience marginally more pleasant.

It still hurt like a bastard, but much less bleeding and (so far) no bruising.

Hysterectomy is still not booked, but I do have a colposcopy booked for 29th November, which happens to be the same day as #1 Son’s Parent-Teacher conference, but thankfully the appointments do not overlap.

It just means that the hus-creature will need to work from home that day.

I earned geek cred with a lovely RN at the clinic for wearing this t-shirt:

She is a fellow GoT geek and we chatted a lot about Season 7 twists and turns.

NO SPOILERS!!!!

I was also wearing Hufflepuff socks, but I didn’t need to show ankles today…

Today was a hard day for #1 Son and we are awaiting an email from his teacher to explain why.

But he did come home sporting this:

So it clearly wasn’t all bad.

TT has spent the last 4+ hours inconsolable for random reasons and I am now counting down the minutes until bedtime.

When you have picky eaters

You will try anything to get them to eat.

But, it’s Sunday evening. The migraine pixie has been attempting to visit (I am staving her off with sugar, salt and caffeine) and quite frankly I reached new heights (or is it depths?) of IDGAF-itude and so came up with this:

The little buggers angels have eaten some of everything.

Which means they have both eaten fruit and there is vegetable in the pasta.

I tell you, I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.

Particularly as I just know that if I do it again they won’t bloody touch it.

Is it wine o’clock yet?

Physicals

Are not fun.

At least my beloved childer-beasts do not think so.

The appointments began at 09:30. We were not home until 11:22!!!

Both children had:

Flu shot
Chicken Pox shot (#1 Son had a booster)
Hepatitis A shot
Hepatitis B shot
Blood drawn (finger stick) for iron levels etc.
Wellness check which was gender specific
Height and weight

#1 Son is on the 74th centile. TT is 91st. The doctor said she had a “cushion” so despite the frustrating faddy eating, beyond a multivitamin daily to not worry so much.

They will start the referrals for #1 Son. They commented he was bright, on target, and were generally positive.

He however did not handle the sticks and jabs brilliantly. Don’t get me wrong, he was very brave honestly, but oh my the histrionics after were by turns heart wrenching and hilarious.

“Why does this happen whenever I come here?” – this was his first visit

“I don’t want to be healthy” – he rejects our explanation of why it had to happen

“I am never going to be healthy ever ever”

He’s either going to be an actor or the teenage years will be… FUN

As it happened to be a half day yesterday, wherein school finished at 12:22 I opted to keep him at home with me and we had a “duvet day” – only with Minecraft in lieu of an actual duvet.

It just seemed prudent.

TT was well overdue for a nap by the time we were done so she threw a tantrum the likes of which I had never seen. Blimey. Screaming, sobbing, sweating, clinging, hitting everything and everyone… the sucker pop calmed her down though.

This counted as her Two Year Review, so barring illness or emergency they don’t need to see her again for 12 months.

They do want to see #1 Son within 6 months to keep an eye on him given the recommendations.

Sadly, the waiting lists are long so it’ll take time, but the doctor wants to see all school reports to talk us through them so I feel much better.

My Sit ‘N Knit class was great – stay tuned for Wonder Woman socks if there’s a skein of that yarn left in the shop next week…

It will have been there, unsought, unloved, for three weeks – it will deserve to be mine!!!!

I also bought a clothing pattern. I’m coming out of my comfort zone.

I also put down the kitten deposit. Missy Kitty Pants will probably be grumpy for a while but meh. She is being a madam at the moment – hiding etc.